Warning: Rated R. Not safe for work.
“OK, we talked about STDs, pregnancy, birth control…did I forget anything?”
What was supposed to be mom taking cute homecoming pictures of me, turned into a horrific birds and the bees rundown.
“No, Mom, you really covered it all. I mean, you even discussed the horrors of childbirth and how to tell if a wound on your lady parts is actually gonorrhea. I’m pretty sure I’m scarred for life so can we be done here?” Like seriously…ew.
“I did forget to tell you to have fun! Come here, baby girl, and hug your mama. I can’t believe you’re going to homecoming. I blinked and suddenly you’re 17. Where did the time go?” Mom hugged me tight and I surprised myself by hugging her back just as tightly. The woman makes me crazy but she’s still my mom.
Although apparently she wasn’t that upset about sending me off to the dance. She tried to make it seem like she was crying, but really she was cheering! I suppose, she didn’t have that much faith in my datability.
Whatevz. Oscar and I piled into the limo Dad rented and off we went. Of course, it just looked like we were going some place fancy. The problem of living in a hick-town, is the complete and total lack of fancy venues. Instead, our homecoming dance was at the local dive bar. I mean, why not throw a bunch of high school seniors into a bar?
Oscar and I made the most of the night regardless of venue. We danced until I could barely stand!
When the dance floor got too full, we headed into the basement for some pool.
I have no idea where I got my mad pool skills but I have a vague idea that it came from mom. I know that lady has more stories than she’s willing to share with her lowly teenage daughter!
When pool got old (only for Oscar since I beat him mercilessly), we tried our hand at some karaoke. That was a more level playing field since we were both terrible.
I went upstairs to mingle while Oscar tried to win me a present. He won me a cute little alligator. I didn’t even care that it’s a toddler toy!
We were allowed to get “bar drinks” at the dance, if by bar drinks you mean fizzy grape juice. Naturally they kept all the drinks behind the bar too so nobody could even try to spike the punch.
Around 10pm they called for the last dance. Oscar and I hopped on the dance floor before heading out to the lock-in.
The lock-in was really the barn apartment over my mom’s stables. The original plan was to prank the school but this morning, I had decided to spend the night with Oscar and whatever that might entail.
“Are you sure that’s what you want to do, Ellie Jayne?” Always the gentleman, Oscar was unsure of my plans.
“Yes, Oscar, I’m sure. I’m ready when you are.” As I led Oscar into the bedroom I wondered if I really was ready.
“Ok…don’t look. I’m getting undressed,” I said nervously.
“You do realize that what you just said makes me think you are actually not ready for this, right?”
“Hm. Good point. Well, maybe I’ll keep my panties on and we can see what happens?” I stood in the corner of the bedroom, more naked than I had ever been in front of another person, and my mother’s speech kept running through my head on repeat. What was I doing here?
“Ok, well, you tell me if you want me to stop.” Oscar leaned into kiss me but stopped abruptly and started to laugh. “Ellie, I haven’t the slightest idea what I’m supposed to do here.”
“You think I do?!” I squeaked at him in response. I thought for a moment, “I think we just kiss and then we’ll know what to do after that. You know, what feels right, I guess?”
Bumbling and giggling, we continued kissing and touching each other. Hopelessly lost in my own head, I realized that I was going to over think this moment. It was now or never.
“I’m ready, Oscar.”
“Are you sure, Ellie? We can wait.” If he didn’t stop talking he would talk me out of it.
“Stop talking and kiss me.”
And with that, I pulled him to me and sealed my fate.
Afterward, as I watched Oscar drift off to sleep, I realized that this was the end of Oscar and I. All I really wanted was a date to homecoming and a fun night of rebellion. I knew all along that I was using Oscar to get mom off my back, but the sex had only popped into my head tonight.
Now, as I lay beside Oscar, only moments after giving him my virginity, I was planning how to get him out of my life.
I fell asleep feeling utterly alone and disgusted with myself.
I woke the next morning and inspected myself in the mirror for any tell-tale signs that I was no longer a virgin. Assured that I looked just the same as I did yesterday, I headed for home. I didn’t even wake Oscar to tell him good-bye.
Of course both my parents were awake and eating breakfast at 6am.
“Ellie Jayne! How was the dance? Did you have fun at the lock-in? Sit down, we’ve saved you breakfast and coffee.”
“Oh, um. It was nice.” I sat down and spun a tale of winning homecoming queen, dancing the night away, and making new friends at the lock-in. I was becoming more adept at lying by the second and I hated myself a little more for it.